Clarity In Muddy Waters

Clarity In Muddy Waters
I am just a tiny speck in our beautiful mass

Tuesday, February 26, 2013


Courtesy of Post Secret.  Instead of juggling all of my life I think now it's time to find balance.  

Home sweet home

You know that saying, "There is no place like home"?  It is true.  I am wondering what defines that feeling, home or hominess.  Is it the pictures of your family on the mantle?  The smells when you walk through the door?  The feeling of when you sit in your special recliner or chair and it just "fits"?

I have moved many times since Kenny has died.  I have managed to make each place feel like home simply by keeping certain things no matter what. Photo albums are very important to me.  Certain pieces of art work.  Books.  Knick knacks. Once I walk into an empty space and bring out my cherished belongings it quickly becomes home.  I am a huge candle/fragrance lover.  I love the smell when I walk in my bedroom and a waft of great smelling air hits me.  Home.

In PA there are many antique shops.  I lucked out on a nice sturdy dark pine desk.  It was supposed to sell for $150 but the 1 wasn't visible on the ticket and in time honored tradition they sold it to me for $50.  I LOVE this desk.  This desk is where all the magic in my life happens.  Crazy huh? Not to me. I pay bills here, write actual hand-written letters and use my laptop.  I have it right in front of one of my bedroom windows.  A room with a view.  My son doesn't get it.  He is like "mom, it's just a desk".  Maybe one day he will understand.

The hardest part of this move was having to take Rocco to Joe's.  God has a plan.  They are developing a great relationship and I get to see him every weekend.  He now has a huge house and yard to play in.  I try to cram in all the love I feel for this dog in two days.  He is finally treating Joe as his master and he sleeps in the bed with Joe.  I hope our dog adds years to his life. 

Time to get the last box of trash out.  I am no longer holding onto things that are taking up space.  I save a few good paper memories, but too much paper simply becomes trash.  Plus I need room for new memories.  Peace!

PS.- Rocco will be 7 months on the 8th of March.  He is growing nicely and I took this pic at Joe's home this past weekend.  Happy Dog....

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Sniffles and coughing

This cold, crazy weather finally has gotten the best of me.  I awoke this morning with  coughing, sneezing etc.  You know the feeling.  I Am Sick feeling.  I am going to load up on vitamin C and cold medicine.  Clean my room.  If motivation keeps coming, I shall make a jaunt to the Laundromat. Our dryer is not working and the landlord seems in no hurry to fix it.  To me it is just as easy to go to the Laundromat and knock it all out at once.  So I am waiting for this Dayquil to kick in and try to get as much done as I can. I hope all is well with everyone. Make each day count, even when you don't fee like it.  Peace!

Monday, February 18, 2013

The world keeps spinning round

I went for a drive last night.  The weather is frigid out.  I love sitting in my car and just listening to the radio or one of my fave cd's.  My sense of motivation in this weather is rather low.  Would love to just burrow under the covers and hide but that would be too easy. The world is moving ahead and I don't want to miss out on anything.  Great food to taste.  Nice people to meet.  Wonderful words I have yet to read.  You get the picture.  I don't want to waste my time lying in bed while I am still active and quite able to move around.  There will be a time maybe when I won't be able to move about and will want to kick myself for not taking advantage of life and all it's offerings.  I am now able to discern whether certain offerings are shit and no good for me, or whether they are potential beautiful moments in the making.  That is one of the benefits of being over 40.  Many people don't get that radar in their youth because they feel invincible.  Most of us are just happy to wake up and not deal with any drama at this point in our lives.  That sums me up right now.  Time to get moving. The day is already late for me and there is quite a bit to do.  Be safe and be gentle!  Peace!

Sunday, February 17, 2013

The "Other" Honda

This is the car that is replacing the totaled Honda.  It rides nice and again, no car payments.  I did go to a car dealership and just scouted out new (used) cars.  Boy do those sales people try hard to get you to buy.  It's almost tiring listening to them preach how they would put their wife or daughter in a certain vehicle.  I am happy with my little white Honda Civic.  The car is paid for.  I have no car payments and I am tickled with that fact.  This car gets great gas mileage.  All these people who drive huge SUV's amaze me.  I don't know how people can afford to put gas in these big vehicles.  It feels great to put $30 in my tank and watch that gauge move all the way up.  Little things like that make me happy as hell.  I'm scared to go wash this car, ( my son did detail it for me before he brought it up) as the day I washed the Accord is when I totaled it.  Ah phooey....when it needs a washing I am not going to believe in all that superstitious  crap.  Time to put some junk in the attic....Have a wonderful weekend!

Lost in cyberspace!!

Finally, I can blog again.  I just decided to start all over rather than keep fighting with google about passwords.  I go into a writing form of withdrawal when I can't post.  It keeps my head clear and it's wonderful to have a place to vent.

I positioned my desk in front of my bedroom window which I am liking a lot. I have a view of all the homes and snow and trees.  Birds are actually coming to my roof to eat.  (Throwing bread out is quite enticing to the birdies).

I hope everyone is well and getting through the daily grind. I want to finish setting this up, sidebar, quotes, etc. 

I do have a case of the cold weather blues. Just did my nails and watching Super Soul Sunday- Oprah.  Nate Berkus is on there and it is actually interesting.  I am going to finish fixing up my bedroom.  Things to hang, and stuff to throw away.  I love and miss you all very much,

I'm baaaccckkkkk....Peace